Talent

This page is from my Altered Book of Me that I’ve been sharing.  Again, I want to thank Tam for providing such an awesome class for free!  I may be slow in getting through the projects, but they have all been wonderful to work on. 

This spread is all about using my talents.  I was a very shy child.  It was hard for me to make friends because of this.  I loved music because I could express myself without stumbling over words or feeling awkward.  When I sat down at the piano, my insecurities lessened and I let the music absorb my overthinking mind and just let my emotions flow out of me in the music I played.  Having that form of expression available to me growing up really helped me cope through troubling times.  I still use playing as a sort of therapy.  If something is troubling me I can sit down and play.  Sometimes I play notes off of the page and just get absorbed into the feelings that the music seems to project.  A lot of the time now, I’ll just sit down and make up things.  I think this impromptu creating of my own music has been the most amazing way to express emotions that I cant seem to voice any other way. 

I also have loved to draw since I was very little.  I grew up being the “musical” one and my brother was the “artist”.  It kinda pisses me off that we were labeled as such because I think it limited both of us.  I didn’t fully embraced my artist side until well into my 30’s.  That’s a lot of years that I could have used to further develop my skills.  I also could have used art as another form of self-expression and self-discovery that would have been quite useful in my teens and twenties.  I let someone else’s idea of who I was shape what I did.  Thankfully, I have grown into some self confidence, and lots of stubborness, so I will never again let someone else’s ideas limit me from who I really am.  It seems as time passes I let what others think of me impact me less and less.  Its a very freeing aspect of aging that no one ever tells you about.  I may not enjoy my body growing older and developing aches and wrinkles, but I love that at this age, I can do what I want without worries that others will think I’m crazy, or weird.  I am a little weird and crazy and I love who I am. 

So, that’s how I use my talents.  I express myself in a way that I’ve never been able to with spoken or written words.  It soothes me and allows me an outlet for my over emotional self.  How do you use your talents?

Altered Book music spread

I’m still sharing from my altered book of me.  This spread represents the powerful role that music has in my life.  I started playing the piano when I was 7 or 8 years old.  I had been begging for lessons for about 2 years prior to being allowed to start.  I fell in love with the piano.  The touch, the sound, the possibilities, all of it.  It opened up a whole new way for me to express myself.  I have played, and still play many instruments but the piano is the biggest love.  I love that I can sit down and play and make my troubles lesson.  I can play music that I adore and put my own spin on it through my performance.  I can make up my own songs and express my innermost thoughts without worrying about using the proper words.  Its an amazing outlet for me and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

This spread celebrates my family and all the laughter and fun we had growing up together.  We didn’t always get along, that whole sibling rivalry thing often reared its head, but overall it was a fun way to grow up.  My brother and sister are very close in age to me, there’s just 3 years separating all of us.  We were often into playing the same things and it was rare to not have someone to do something with.  The harder thing was to find some privacy when it was needed! 

Music and family both had huge impacts on forming who I am today so I wanted to celebrate each of them with spreads in the “Book of Me.”  So, what has impacted you in your life?

More pretty girls

I'm still working on pretty girls by following SuziBlu's Petite Doll course. I'm not strictly following her instructions even though they are wonderful. I needed to get the girl in front of the piano out of my mind and onto paper/wood. She'll hang in my office for all my piano students to see on their arrival. The quote, from Plato, says: "Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything." Those aspects of communication are the reasons that music has been and always will be an integral part of my world. I have always expressed my emotions better through music than a spoken or written word. Unfortunatly, I feel that my spoken word truly deteriorated after my little mini stroke. I'm not truly complaining, I am very lucky at the mildness of the episode, but at times I truly cant find words, simple words, and it is very frustrating to the well-educated side of me to be lacking in this respect. Thankfully my musical skills seem to have withstood without a lasting negative effect. I can sit down and pour out every last drop of emotion. Happiness, sadness, grief, playfullness, just about anything can be articulately expressed through a song. It pours out any emotion and truly leave me feeling better, more level, like I've just been through some intensive therapy.
Anyways, once again my words are jumbling. I hope that each of you has that "something" that allows your world to be more peaceful and soothing. Take care.

A very merry christmas

I hope everyone had a great Christmas. I'm sorry I've been such a bad blogger. Things get pretty hectic around Christmas when you're a church musician. Thankfully everything went well and all my big services are over. I even pulled up the nerve and played the harp for 3 different services.

Every year my family draws names and makes a gift for someone. This year I got my cousin Sarah. She loves frogs so I made her this puzzle box. I used 5 different boxes to modify and put together the final design. I used magnets to help everything stay in place when its closed. The frog sits on a dowel which must be removed in order to open the box and get the lid covering the drawers off. Lots of clay and paint made the box pretty. I think that she really loves it.
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